I carefully hoard all the cherry stones and fling them into the composter, hoping naively for a small grove of cherry saplings at some point when the potato peelings and what have you have all disintegrated into that gorgeous, bosky-smelling dark stuff.

I more or less meant for people who actually know the Evil Landlord to mail him, I think the sudden appearance of random wishes from total strangers on different continents might be more disconcerting than pleasurable. Although if he doesn't notice this one I might escalate it next year. Memo to self, in 2010 start snowballing internet meme culminating in a strategic post on, eg, Neil Gaiman's blog and ending up with three million complete strangers mailing the EL birthday greetings...