Freckles & Doubt (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
freckles_and_doubt) wrote2019-01-04 05:05 pm
freckles_and_doubt) wrote2019-01-04 05:05 pm
Entry tags:
if it doesn't end I'm going to kill it with knives
I appear to have done the usual year-end shutdown, I have been noodling around the house doing not much, replaying Mass Effect: Andromeda and, by way of conceptual whiplash, Stardew Valley, in haphazard rotation. I have, at least, succeeded in resuscitating my early morning walking habit, which has been pleasant and is making me feel less blobby. I have petted the cats a lot, and instituted another book throw-out, which was pleasingly cathartic and has once more trimmed the collection to fit the available shelf space. I allowed New Year's Eve to pass unmarked and largely unnoticed, bar being rudely awoken at midnight by the usual outbreaks of fireworks and the traditional wrong number phone call just as I was drifting back off to sleep.
This has been a year in limbo: I have made gestures of marching onward while remaining firmly in place. This is possibly because I'm not sure which direction I should be marching in, and am generally mistrusting or fearing all visible and possible goals.
Things achieved by me in 2018: not a whole lot, actually. Survival of the faculty melt-down; a dignified detachment from the evil hell-boss, both her presence and her departure; management of a functioning unit with reasonably happy subordinates in the teeth of widespread dysfunction. Final proofread of one paper for publication (Nesbit fairy tale), an invitation to write another (20C fairy-tale adaptation). New curtains, new tyres on my car, a new haircut. Continuation with daily living in the face of ongoing global political fuckwittery. None of it seems particularly significant.
Things not achieved by me: A new job, or sufficient momentum to hoik myself by the bootstraps out of the existential issue-pit into which the contemplation of leaving academic has flung me. This is still a work in progress. I'm working on it.
Losses: Ursula Le Guin, Tumblr's identity, career change momentum.
Things discovered by me in 2018: 17776, Starship Iris, fibre internet, ineffectual druiding under conditions of extreme water restriction, Yonder: The Cloudcatcher Chronicles, the Fallout soundtrack, the Murderbot Diaries, cooking with artichokes, Naomi Novik fairy tales, commissioning oaths, Mass Effect tie-in novels by Cat Valente and NK Jemisin, Dappermouth artworks, wind farms up close.
Resolutions for 2019: survive another orientation/registration, write this paper, find another job. In that order.
Happy new year, all. By way of distraction from the inexorable march of time, I recommend Scenes from a Multiverse's take on it.
This has been a year in limbo: I have made gestures of marching onward while remaining firmly in place. This is possibly because I'm not sure which direction I should be marching in, and am generally mistrusting or fearing all visible and possible goals.
Things achieved by me in 2018: not a whole lot, actually. Survival of the faculty melt-down; a dignified detachment from the evil hell-boss, both her presence and her departure; management of a functioning unit with reasonably happy subordinates in the teeth of widespread dysfunction. Final proofread of one paper for publication (Nesbit fairy tale), an invitation to write another (20C fairy-tale adaptation). New curtains, new tyres on my car, a new haircut. Continuation with daily living in the face of ongoing global political fuckwittery. None of it seems particularly significant.
Things not achieved by me: A new job, or sufficient momentum to hoik myself by the bootstraps out of the existential issue-pit into which the contemplation of leaving academic has flung me. This is still a work in progress. I'm working on it.
Losses: Ursula Le Guin, Tumblr's identity, career change momentum.
Things discovered by me in 2018: 17776, Starship Iris, fibre internet, ineffectual druiding under conditions of extreme water restriction, Yonder: The Cloudcatcher Chronicles, the Fallout soundtrack, the Murderbot Diaries, cooking with artichokes, Naomi Novik fairy tales, commissioning oaths, Mass Effect tie-in novels by Cat Valente and NK Jemisin, Dappermouth artworks, wind farms up close.
Resolutions for 2019: survive another orientation/registration, write this paper, find another job. In that order.
Happy new year, all. By way of distraction from the inexorable march of time, I recommend Scenes from a Multiverse's take on it.