Freckles & Doubt (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
freckles_and_doubt) wrote2017-08-18 01:47 pm
freckles_and_doubt) wrote2017-08-18 01:47 pm
Entry tags:
shit my students say
Things that students have said in emails to me today:
"Dear. Please could you..." (I assume they meant to type my name after "Dear" and forgot, but it's rather sweet like this.)
"Goof morning!" (Followed by somewhat of a silly question, so possibly this was actually the correct designation for the day).
Things that my students have said to me in person today:
"I'll tell my personal assistant to set up a reminder to follow up on Wednesday." (he did, in fact, have a personal assistant. In tow. Kids these days...)
This week I have been croaked at by three different laryngitis sufferers and snuffled at by at least one phlegmy parent, so I am expecting lurgis incoming on my hapless form in the near future. I have scored one bar of chocolate, one bag of jellybeans, and tearful gratitude from three different students, which set against only one twenty-minute dissociated rant and blame session from an angry parent, actually puts me ahead. The jellybeans gave me a weird moment of dislocated nostalgia in that they tasted exactly like the little pink chalky cylindrical sweets we used to get as kids, which five minutes of illicit googling suggest were actually Romantics cachous, although I remember them as having an elephant on the wrapper - that might have been a mutant Zimbabwean version. They tasted dusty and pink, I have a very vivid memory of the flavour.
I am beyond dead, but it's Friday. I have not to date eviscerated any students or myself. It could be worse.
"Dear. Please could you..." (I assume they meant to type my name after "Dear" and forgot, but it's rather sweet like this.)
"Goof morning!" (Followed by somewhat of a silly question, so possibly this was actually the correct designation for the day).
Things that my students have said to me in person today:
"I'll tell my personal assistant to set up a reminder to follow up on Wednesday." (he did, in fact, have a personal assistant. In tow. Kids these days...)
This week I have been croaked at by three different laryngitis sufferers and snuffled at by at least one phlegmy parent, so I am expecting lurgis incoming on my hapless form in the near future. I have scored one bar of chocolate, one bag of jellybeans, and tearful gratitude from three different students, which set against only one twenty-minute dissociated rant and blame session from an angry parent, actually puts me ahead. The jellybeans gave me a weird moment of dislocated nostalgia in that they tasted exactly like the little pink chalky cylindrical sweets we used to get as kids, which five minutes of illicit googling suggest were actually Romantics cachous, although I remember them as having an elephant on the wrapper - that might have been a mutant Zimbabwean version. They tasted dusty and pink, I have a very vivid memory of the flavour.
I am beyond dead, but it's Friday. I have not to date eviscerated any students or myself. It could be worse.
no subject
(Anonymous) 2017-08-18 05:31 pm (UTC)(link)The PA thing has me absolutely floored. But I'm not sure whether I'm more shocked that he *had* a PA, or that he needs the PA to perform such a basic task as setting a reminder. I mean some of us have apps, or (Luddites!) actual diaries. Then again I guess the PA will have the happy task of actually doing the following up, so, well. It's definitely just the having of the PA that bugs me. A lot. Are you sure it wasn't an elaborate prank? Perhaps some kind of performance art? I wish to believe it was Theatre.
no subject
(Anonymous) 2017-08-18 05:31 pm (UTC)(link)no subject
A subsequent interview with both of his parents and the "PA" revealed that the "PA" is in fact the student's sister. The student in question is both hyper-articulate and hyper-active, and it may in fact have been a joking adoption of corporate language (he also referred to his "office"), but she is certainly running the boring and fiddly aspects of his life for him. It's a nice trick if you can pull it off. I suspect that you might have to be male for culture in general, including the sister, to buy it.