my postillion has been struck by lightning

Apart from hating me, my body apparently has a Puritan work ethic, which I take somewhat personally given my ongoing state of happy atheism. I've been very tired and sore under the chin for the last couple of weeks, causing me to mutter "Bloody glandular fever" and take it as easy as possible, but it's been more or less routine. Wednesday was my last day of work before three weeks of holiday. On Thursday morning, technically the first day of my break, the one where I got to ceremonially sleep late, I was rudely awoken at 5am by the worst dose of gastric 'flu I think I've ever had. Yesterday was characterised by the horizontal position, while vague thoughts along the lines of "surely this death thing can't be as bad as they say it is, it seems like a viable alternative" passed through my aching head. I couldn't eat, I couldn't stay upright for more than about twenty minutes, I couldn't watch videos; I had to cancel the Fiasco! game we had planned (phooey). I couldn't even drink tea. It was that bad. pumeza kindly rallied around with remedies, which helped, but it was still a horrible day.

Today I'm somewhat better, able to actually face the computer (and if I'm off the internet you know it's serious), and drink at least half a cup of tea, but I'm still aching and feverish and moving very, very slowly. I am also extremely narked. Bloody hell, it's not fair to save all this up for when my holiday actually starts. About the only consolation for illness is being able to take time off work, and here it is, coming out of my hard-earned leave. Phooey. All very noble, for my body to stave it off until my obligations are met, but I don't feel noble, I feel annoyed.

I am also, I fear, going to be a complete fader and cancel on hosting the usual Boxing Day braai. The Evil Landlord is in Australia; I've been extremely disorganised and haven't actually invited anyone; and in my current state I am contemplating with fear and loathing the prospect of either Crowds or Food. I shall try and catch up with people individually instead, which is likely to be easier on my 'flu-racked form, and to hold out faint hope that I'll actually enjoy seeing y'all rather than simply growling at you like a petulant bear.