feeling battered

Sunday, 17 May 2009 09:54 pm
freckles_and_doubt: (Default)
[personal profile] freckles_and_doubt
Oh, joy, after a week of exhaustion, weird spaceyness and the short-fuse temper from hell, the head-cold part of this bloody 'flu thing has hit. Once again I am a disgusting object, with Sid the Sinus Headache joyously laying cement in my skull. I managed, however, to distract myself from it sufficiently this evening to help the Evil Landlord produce a fondue evening for jo&stv and sven&tanya, which was fun, particularly since I elected to try out tempura batter in the fondue pot for the first time. (Verdict: good, and lightens the meat-heavy quotient of your average oil fondue, although it's difficult to get the fat truly hot enough on the tiny spirit flame). We fondued thin bits of sweet potato, butternut, brinjal, carrot and asparagus. Also, tempura-battered prawns ftw.

The really weird meeting of minds I have with Jo can be indexed in the perfectly serious fifteen-minute discussion we subsequently had about the exciting and inevitable art installation we could mount by disassembling a brand new latest-model Japanese small car (Honda or Toyota, or possibly a Suzuki motorcycle), and tempura-battering and deep-frying its component parts before reassembling and suspending it in exploded-car-diagram format. We feel this would constitute profound and self-aware cultural commentary, emblematising the interchangeability of consumer-cultural paradigms while simultaneously investigating notions of "freshness" and "value"1. We are open to grant offers which would enable the realisation of this promising but expensive and technically challenging work. Or, for that matter, to franchising.

The Telkom saga continues: while they actually installed my dad's phone line on Thursday, we've been unable to phone any international numbers. When I phoned the helpline to report the fault, they told me, in tones of dulcet surprise, that oh, no! of course you can't get international lines, they're automatically locked with a new phone, and you need to have them unlocked. No, of course you can't do it via the helpline, you need to go into the Telkom Direct store and do it in person. No, of course no-one in any of the five different discussions you had with helplines and the store before installing the line actually mentioned this. That would constitute service, which runs counter to everything Telkom stands for.

Bastards. Also open to grant offers which would enable me to employ ninja assassins, preferably with a wholesale option.

1 Or "Japanese".

Car + Art = Cart

Date: Sunday, 17 May 2009 11:06 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Love the art idea. If you could say it with a straight face, I'm sure the Tate Modern or Charles Saatchi would spring you some cash for it. :-)

Re: Car + Art = Cart

Date: Monday, 18 May 2009 01:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] extemporanea.livejournal.com
I'm quite good at the straight face when voicing academic jargon, a necessary skill as an academic given that I'm constitutionally incapable of taking jargon seriously. The me/Jo discussion last night was straight-faced enough to have innocent bystanders cowering in a corner wondering precisely where the conversation went off the rails into a parallel universe in which "sense" had a very different meaning.

Date: Monday, 18 May 2009 04:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] veratiny.livejournal.com
This is an artist who you may find of interest (in your new collaborative arts partnership)...if you are working with car parts (also her working habits may be of interest, she forms the concept and then gets other people to make it...brilliant...art without getting your hands dirty):

http://www.patriciapiccinini.net/

Reviewing arts grants for sense (um...you are in with a chance there), grammar (ha) and budgets (ha ha ha) is something I do professionally, if you would like me to check your draft prior to submission. A project such as yours lends it self to philanthropic or corporate support rather than government funding (as currently governments don’t seem to have any of it)--have you considered approaching a batter manufacturer?

Date: Monday, 18 May 2009 01:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] extemporanea.livejournal.com
Oooh, her cute scooter people are incredibly endearing. No batter, though. She's clearly not on the representational cutting edge.

I can see it: "The New Toyota Tempura" - installation sponsored by Major Japanese Fast Food Chain, for an additional layer of consumer irony.

Deep-fried art

Date: Monday, 18 May 2009 02:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maxbarners.livejournal.com
I take full credit, it being my idea and all.
I think.
Maybe.

No mention of the Knee-mounted Scarven Face of Bo, I see.
Probably for the best...
:)

Re: Deep-fried art

Date: Monday, 18 May 2009 04:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] extemporanea.livejournal.com
I thought it was Jo's idea? did I miss an earlier bit of the conversation and only pick it up at the point where she reiterated it? Not quite on this planet at the moment, me.

Re: Deep-fried art

Date: Monday, 18 May 2009 04:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] extemporanea.livejournal.com
Bugger, reading my own post back I've just realised that I didn't, as I'd fondly imagined I did, actually attribute the idea to her. Blame student interruptions, Sid the Sinus Headache and my cheese-brain.

Telkom are the pits

Date: Monday, 18 May 2009 07:01 pm (UTC)

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